>Less then one week after firing the previous GM, the Philadelphia Phillies fans are already calling for the firing of his replacement, FW_Kekionga. Even for the notoriously fickle, rude, and impatient Philly fanbase, this opinion is particularly rapid in it’s ascendence. What has brought about this sea change in the originally massively favorable fan opinion of new GM FW is the teams horrific record since he took over, taking the team from 3 games out of first place to a losing record and 11 games back in less then a week.
Phillies superfan Sal LoVecchio had this to say of new GM FW_Kekionga, “He’s a piece of crap. I want to punch him in the face and vomit on his daugher!” That sentiment was shared by notorious superfan Matthew Clemmens, who also said he would vomit on FW_Kekionga’s daughter if given the opportunity. It was hard to find a fan who approved of FW’s handling of the GM job, with the exception of Santa Clause, who said, “Any person willing to put up with the grief that lot of morons gives you on a daily basis immediately gets put on my ‘nice’ list. According to my records only 7 out of nearly 3 million Phillies fans hasn’t been put on my ‘naughty’ list and is in line for a lump of coal this year, so FW is in elite company!”
When asked about the cold reception he has received, FW_Kekionga was rather ambivalent. “Look, the only reason I took this job is because this team looks good on paper and Philly has some great cheesesteaks. In fact, I hate Philadelphia, if I had my druthers I would pack this sad sack of a franchise up and move it to the Midwest. Even Detroit is better then this town, and believe me that is saying a lot!” FW went on to add, “I can see why the original GM left this dump of a city, but I’m stuck with it, and even though this team isn’t performing well at the moment I think my lifetime record as a GM speaks for itself. If they want to moan about how their overpaid and underperforming players can’t score a run and how their bullpen could probably be swapped with the rookie squad with no perceivable difference, well, that’s not my fault that they are uneducated baseball fans.”
Making matters worse is the clamoring of the fan base that rawdk should have been hired as GM instead, citing the fact that he actually loves Philadelphia, and has a proven track record as a winning GM. But new GM FW_Kekionga still harbors a grudge against said GM for some World Series loss in another time and place many years ago that he still feels should have been his victory, so he is refusing to leave the GM chair. “I’m like Jim Hendry,” FW said, “no matter how much you hate me, you are stuck with me.”