Well I’ve been through 3 networks and back again on BTR this week. Can’t really get along with people. They seem to think I don’t respect them. I guess I may come across that way if you don’t know me. Most of the regulars know I can be sarcastic. That being said, I feel like after a over a year on BTR that some of them should give a little my way.
Yeah maybe Im not the cool kid. Maybe I’ve been a dirtbag. Maybe since I’ve always done physical work I dont have any right to try to turn this into anything. The dirtbag part was only unveiled because some were sensitive to my material or bitter from the past. Some people will go to any length to suppress the truth. Some don’t know when to stop beating the dead horse.
This partnering up thing has gone harder than I expected. I feel like Im being utilized as the workhorse/gopher type. I don’t think I could’ve made it any clearer to people what my intentions were but no one got it. Also when I make a deal I expect Im dealing direct, not with whoever else – fill in the blank. I don’t mind putting time and effort in, but when you have a lot of Chiefs you will have conflicts. I don’t want to have to answer to the Indians.
I’ve lost my way. I feel confined to what other people want me to do when on their networks or them on mine. I have to express whatever it is that came out of me that people used to listen for. I always thought maybe it was a bad car wreck scenario for them. That just being me thing worked out to the point I gained online stalkers and even a few ghosts from the distant past. I even got to be a host of the vaunted FreedomizerRadio on BTR.
The battles with Wild Goose, ahhh seems like ancient days now. Same with Freedomizer – sort of fun, but probably hurt everyone involved. The numbers were good overall considering the deadness in general on BTR lately. We need some battles but it really should be confined to mocking the show content. Of course theres always someone who doesn’t play along.
I see that CrazyWolfRadio is back on, thanks for the penny and the time you wasted donating it. For joy!!! My second donation!!! I almost miss the days of Rambo/Tancredo, CWR, myself, and the people in our way. 😉 – last summer.
Well all that I wanted came in the form of WillZpi. He had a great show. We seemed to talk the same language. I was willing to share in the fruits of the beloved Knucklebones Radio name. (He’ll probably steal it for spite – ha! I dont care about names so much, I have a great imagination) – Bottom line he offered the Holy Grail of BTR, the branded premium and the sponsor/partner I needed to really go off the charts with this online radio thing then BOOM!, it happened.
Lets rewind to after the previous evenings show were we complimented each other on how great we did as far as yielding to each other. Passing the coversation back and forth smoothly and keeping the show moving. We thought we had a winner. We discussed how difficult it was and how we impressed ourselves and had high hopes.
Back to last night. Willz appears with about 5mins to spare. I see him on the keyboard. I understand because I know that hes been out on the water and probably beat but Im ready just in case. I also moved the show back 30 minutes to match up with my latenight solo thing. He can’t see me because Im not logged in on skype or chat. He starts the show. I start bumbling around with the skype and have problems as is common with skype and/or BTR – all of us vets know the drill.
Not too many minutes in as I hear the show load I hear the dreaded complaints about where am I? I can’t get in but I can’t tell him. So I finally get into the show and ready to go. WillZ seems tired/cranky. I feel a bit in neutral since its his lead and im cohost. I also start off my own shows with multiple songs and few words to let them know Im there. Everyone has their own way.
Continuing, … I can hear the tiredness and decide Ill take the reigns and help him out. Hes not in chat so I have no way to communicate other than skype with the show on mute – play a song. Screening room seems like a good place but not necessary even without chat. Mute your voice, play a song, talk while it plays. Anyways vet hosts on BTR know this. The new studio on there is also a learning process. Of course Wendy is there but I wasn’t thinking about the chat like I always do at first or throughout shows. I do if its busy and the host is on a roll and I do it if Im NOT on a roll and solo. Otherwise chat is to field questions or come up with material people want commentary on. Its also for them to chit chat with each other. That is the main reason for it. I also didn’t see her number.
I dont think we were 15 minutes into the show and I get a private message. I didn’t like the message. That is the end of my side of the story on this. I’ve got nothing else to say on it and I know people will ask.
I admittedly have a problem with authority and authority figures. Any network I join I will be an equal partner in. If they’re putting up the money then they dont have to work as hard, but they don’t rule. They also get other side benefits by being the sponsor if they are creative. Im an easy guy. Looking for a 50/50 split on the next level up. Not looking to be an employee or to answer to anyone. I can be on freedomizer for that (zing – really just kidding)
Lastly. Just a heads up to those that plan on trying to team up. You are a confident person if you can do any kind of social anything, including this BTR radio. You also probably have some kind of ego. Egos are going to clash. That is the nature of 2 individuals trying to do it but necessary to have a winner.
I dont feel like I owe anyone an apology here. Its fine if people have a hard day. Its not so hot if someone else has to bear the brunt of it. Call in sick and/or if you have complaints deal with it after the show. These shows can be three hours long. Give it a few minutes and maybe it gets good. My worst starts have been some of my best shows. I know that because I’ve been around awhile.
I would never nuke someones show on purpose by the way. I heard a certain listener speculating. I did retrieve my name but one would only have to reload the switchboard. All better now.
So anyway, Im the king of shooting myself in the foot. I aired it out. There would’ve been no where to go but AM radio after a deal like this. I just couldn’t brownose. Not in my DNA. I didn’t do it at Freedomizer, wont do it for a partner forking over a small risk investment. Also AM radio hype is relative. The web is the wave of the near future. Glen Beck left TV for the internet. Anyways. respect is a mutual thing. Im tired, I’ll catch whatever knuckleheads are left tomorrow latenight and start all over again.